Fun with Scammers

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D. Phillips
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Fun with Scammers

Post by D. Phillips »

So, I am selling a car. It's posted on Craigslist and one of the scams that site warns users of is the old "Money Order to Ship Overseas" trick. I received an email within hours of posting. He asked for the final price and I responded. Then things got fun. Here's our conversation:
Thanks so Much for your great reply and response, But before I proceed with the transaction I will like to ask some questions as follow (1) Do you accept cashiers check or Money Order as mode of payment (2) Can you let my shipping company come for the pick up in your house.
If yes pls get back to me with your full name, contact address and phone# so that I can mail out the payment asap.

Thank you for your cooperation.


Mr. Alloy.
[email protected]> wrote:
There would be a $50 surcharge for a cashiers check. This may sound strange, but I'd need it made out to "Mr. Pickles" and then sent right away. I would also like the check accompanied by a young, hairless Asian girl.

Where are we shipping this thing to? Can I pack it full of drugs for delivery to a friend? I would allow you to sample the goods as payment.

Get back to me asap. I think we can do business.
Alloy mike <> wrote:
Dear Glorious,
I am expecting ur name and full contact to send payment.
I figured the jig was up and I'd heard the last of Alloy. Minutes ago, he rang me up via Instant Messenger! Ho boy, now I'm having fun. (I replaced his handle so you lot don't harrass him):
[17:07] SCAMMER: hello
[17:07] dp_glono: hello
[17:07] SCAMMER: how are u doing
[17:07] dp_glono: just fine. Who are you?
[17:08] SCAMMER: am Mike Alloy
[17:08] dp_glono: Oh, hey Mike
[17:08] SCAMMER: I just got your reply now
[17:08] dp_glono: Ha!
[17:08] SCAMMER: how are u doing
[17:08] dp_glono: good
[17:08] dp_glono: still
[17:08] SCAMMER: aight
[17:09] SCAMMER: so u said am going to pay $50 more if am sending u check?
[17:09] dp_glono: Yeah, and don't forget the delivery--wink wink
[17:10] dp_glono: Where would the car be shipped?
[17:11] SCAMMER: am buying it for my Father In Law
[17:11] SCAMMER: so until he tells me
[17:11] SCAMMER: but my shipping company will handle that
[17:12] dp_glono: So, how do you picture this going down?
[17:12] SCAMMER: hun! it's ok
[17:13] SCAMMER: when are u sending the full name, contact address and ur number so that I can mail the check asap?
[17:13] dp_glono: You're buying this car sight unseen for asking price?
[17:13] SCAMMER: I believe you are real
[17:14] dp_glono: Oh, I'm real alright
[17:14] SCAMMER: and when my shipping company get to you it's ok by me
[17:15] dp_glono: That sound ominous
[17:15] SCAMMER: how do u mean
[17:15] dp_glono: dastardly
[17:15] dp_glono: Daibolical, even
[17:16] dp_glono: Forgive my typing, I have the shakes
[17:16] SCAMMER: anyway
[17:16] SCAMMER: I've sent you the reply so I will be expecting the name, contact addre and ur number
[17:16] dp_glono: It's why I'm selling the car. I need to pay off some bad people
[17:16] SCAMMER: it's ok
[17:17] dp_glono: Hence, my suggestion on the other delivery I mentioned
[17:17] dp_glono: You know, in my email
[17:18] dp_glono: These people are known horse killers, liek you hear about on thrid world radio.
[17:18] dp_glono: awful folks
[17:18] dp_glono: I haven't slept for days. Thinking about what they'll do to me.
[17:18] dp_glono: They actually said they'd cut my nose off and swallow it. They would EAT my nose!
[17:19] dp_glono: Who would do such a thing????
[17:19] SCAMMER: please if you know u are serious about the car, get back to me by sending me the info so that I can mail out ur money
[17:19] dp_glono: Maniacs who hang out with degenerate old drug fiends!
[17:20] dp_glono: Well, I am serious. Dead serious. It's a crtitcal time
[17:20] dp_glono: The juice is running, as they say
[17:20] SCAMMER: ok
[17:21] SCAMMER: send me the info
[17:21] SCAMMER: ok
[17:21] SCAMMER: have to go now
[17:21] dp_glono: What else?
[17:21] SCAMMER: take care
[17:21] dp_glono: Pictures?
[17:21] dp_glono: I have lots
[17:21] SCAMMER: yes u can send it with the picture
[17:21] dp_glono: Like when I went to Hawaii a few years ago
[17:21] dp_glono: My niecesa re in those, don't get any ideas
[17:22] dp_glono: I also have pictures from when I was a kid
[17:22] dp_glono: They're hilarious! Oh, the 80s...
[17:22] dp_glono: Didn't we all have bad hair then?
[17:22] SCAMMER: ok
[17:22] SCAMMER: I have to go now
[17:22] dp_glono: Did you ever have a rat tail haircut?
[17:22] SCAMMER: nice chating with u
[17:22] dp_glono: Like Flock of Seagulls
[17:22] dp_glono: No wonder the Ozone is a mess, eh?
[17:23] dp_glono: Jesus, the hairspray back then...
[17:23] dp_glono: And what ever happened to TACO?
[17:23] dp_glono: Remember him?

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Post by jaimoe0 »

That is priceless. But seriously, if you will just send me the requested info, I can get ur money odor in the mail right away. Don't forget address and phone #.

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Post by Jake »

I don't get the scam. What is he going to do with your full name, address and phone number?

D. Phillips
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Post by D. Phillips »

The scam is that the "Cashier's Check" will be fake. A lot of people think thy're good as cash, but they ain't.

Just the same. I hope Alloy Friendsters me.

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Post by johnhl »

I've got my pickup for sale. Guess I should put it on Craigslist. To think for the last two weeks I've just had it sitting in front of my house with a for sale sign when I could be having so much fun...

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Post by worpswede »

Favorite lines:
"Forgive my typing, I have the shakes"
"The juice is running, as they say"
"Did you ever have a rat tail haircut?"
"And whatever happened to TACO?"
there's the first verse of your next song, right there.
What the fuck was with the "hun! it's ok"?
Was that some kind of lame empathy attempt.
Coming from "Mike"?! Creepy
Aw, sweetie. Don't worry about those horse-killin' nose eaters. Let me steal your car instead.
I'm assuming that the "shipping company" delivers the fake cashiers check and then takes your ride.

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Post by russ »

I'm still waiting for your number and home address......


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Post by Mixmaster Shecky »

Good job, D. Eating your nose - nice touch!

I love the names the scammers pick out. Mr. Alloy - sounds like a Monty Python name.

I sold my PSP thru Craigs and got a ton of scammers, and they had names like Mr. Jefferson Cats (from Belgium). Don't they ever watch tv? They could get tons of believable names.

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Post by Barabajagal »

Nice job!!! hilarious

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Post by Saucy Jack »

Bloody good show!

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