Do you miss Johnny Loftus’ award show coverage? Get your fix at the Metro Times Music Blahg. J-Lo covered the VMAs for GLONO in 2004, 2003, 2002, and 2001. [Updated link, 9/1/2017. -ed.]
Another one bites the dust – Johnny Loftus watches the newbies, the needy, and the nervy-eyed veterans jockey for position at the 2005 TCAs, the awards show where no one’s winner. The shit’s like rotten prunes. P-R-U-N-E-S.
The 47th Grammy Awards emphasized performers over presenters. Music, of course, more effectively justifies a three hour-plus runtime than the common award show litany of envelopes and air kisses.
Devoid of controversy, its skin covered up, and generally reeking of self-congratulatory bullshit, the 2004 MTV Video Music Awards were a nonstarter of hoobastankian proportions.
This year’s Teen Choice Awards was filled with love for the “OC” and Lindsay Lohan, arguably, um, the two biggest things in youth culture this year. Johnny Loftus watches bad TV so you don’t have to!
This year’s Grammys became an unraveling ball of elaborate performance setpieces, distended award receptions, unfinished strings of confused reaction shots and glittering, empty platforms.
History and Revisionist Reality at the 2003 VMAs What’s that flinty taste in our mouth? Why, it’s the unforgiving barrel of the Mossberg 12 gauge jammed between our teeth. The shooter’s face is distorted – garish, hyper-real images flicker unabated eighteen inches away, just above the chamber. Bursts of red, washed-out orange, and otherworldly, shimmering … Continue reading The White Mouse Has Escaped!
It was really only a matter of time. In a music-hungry ad landscape that licenses Smashmouth’s “You Are My Number One” the very WEEK the band’s latest effort is released, wasn’t it inevitable that Digable Planets’ finger-popping 1993 single “Cool Like That” would find new life as the pitch music for laser-guided toothpicks, biggie-size Swifters, … Continue reading 2003 Teen Choice Awards: Cool Like That?
Los Angeles’ Shrine Auditorium is a 6,000+ capacity facility, but you wouldn’t know it from watching the 2003 MTV Movie Awards, held May 31st but only aired by the network last night. The event took place in a vacuum, seeming only to exist inside a right triangle stretching from the top of its elaborate superhero … Continue reading The 2003 MTV Movie Awards
Eminem won the best-song Oscar for “Lose Yourself,” the dramatic anthem from his film 8 Mile. It was the only nominated song not to be performed during the ceremony, but Em’s decision to skip the show saved the Oscar people, since they were shitting their pants over “Lose Yourself”‘s liberal use of profanity. Indeed, the … Continue reading Think I Give A Damn About…