Tag Archives: Madonna

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Madison Avenue Groove

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Madonna's Gap ad“If Britney manages to have as long and successful of a career as Madonna, I will renounce Ms. Ciccone as my Supreme Woman and no longer think about her when I masturbate. Yeah, that would be harder than quitting smoking”— Jeff Sabatini, “Britney vs. Madonna,” Glorious Noise, February 8, 2001

Back in the early days when this site was somewhat younger, there used to be observations on the main page like that quoted here. Perhaps we were somewhat less circumspect.

I thought about that last night when I saw the Madonna/Missy (Misdemeanor) Elliott commercial for the Gap. And although Britney has faded into irrelevance such that her visibility is marked with a certain desperation, a need to get in the public eye, almost as though her doing damn near anything to get some time on “Entertainment Tonight” would not be in the least bit surprising (e.g., dangling herself off of an eighth-floor balcony), Madonna, heretofore, a film career that she ought to abandon, notwithstanding, has—or had—maintained a certain allure.

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Buy Another Day

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Although most of us at GloNo are de facto supporters of the Wintel cabal, there is a non-insignificant portion of the crew that believes that Apple is the way to go (or actually, Linux is the way to go but it has proven to be such a pain in the ass to master that its relevance is inappropriate—for now). While there may have been some questions vis-à-vis Apple’s use of poor grammar (“Think Different”) or the co-opting of historical figures to shill hardware (does anyone really think that Gandhi would have used a G4?), for the most part it is perceived to be more innocuous than, say, the use of “Start Me Up” by the fine folks in Redmond for the launch of Windows 95 (does anyone really think that Keith Richards would get excited by an operating system?).

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Madonna: Drowning in a Sea of Bombast

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Kevin Costner seemed to be on top of the movie world. Handsome. Charming. Known to be the dead guy in the tuxedo that Lawrence Kasdan left on the cutting room floor at the start of The Big Chill. He was on a roll.

Then came a day in late July 1995. Waterworld was released. And arguably Costner’s career, if not entirely submerged, at least became all wet.

Which was brought to mind by the name of the tour that has been announced by an individual “[W]idely considered amongst the greatest performers in modern musical history,” a tour that “promises to be the most extravagant stage spectacle” of this extravagant spectacle’s career. As the news release, from which those quotes are extracted, breathlessly announces in the headline: “Superstar’s Back on Stage After 8 Year Absence.” Yes, we’re talking about Madonna.

The name of the tour (and why do tours have names?): The Drowned World Tour.

It “promises to be an ecstatic celebration of artistry and technology.” Sort of sounds like what Costner had been up to, too.

(BTW, Sab: The Palace, August 25. And for you in the Great City, United Center, the 28th.)

Articles

Britney vs. Madonna

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If Britney manages to have as long and successful of a career as Madonna, I will renounce Ms. Ciccone as my Supreme Woman and no longer think about her when I masturbate. Yeah, that would be harder than quitting smoking was, seeing as it’s a 16+ year-old habit, but I won’t have to do it. No way, no how. Britney Spears is just a little talentless pandering hotbox. Madonna was a bitch (and yes, I’m using that in the complimentary way) and a rebel and Britney, well, she’s a corporate brand. In ten years she’ll be fat and married to some burnt out former child actor (Macauley Culkin perhaps?). They’ll have a house in Orange county and a decent income from investments and periodically she’ll appear on Entertainment Tonight talking about her cause du jour— freeing caged apes or some shit like that. Why are we even wasting our time thinking about her? Is the world that devoid of good new artists that we have to actually pay attention to her? I know we can’t just wallow in the early 70s forever (or can we?) but isn’t somebody doing something more interesting than B.S. (nice initials)? What are Liam and Noel up to?