She’s the pretty dirty girl and wet dream of dorks everywhere and now she’s hosting the MTV Movie Awards, the second lamest awards show on television—just behind the People’s Choice Awards. But I’ll be watching, which is exactly why they hired her.
I am now in a different demographic than I was just a year ago. Moving from the 18-24 bracket was fun as I could now drink AND rent a car. The transition from 25-30 was a bit more difficult as it only meant I was now a thirty-something and who could help but think of that dopey 80s drama with boring people and their boring problems? The 30-34 bracket is the new 18-24 because Americans refuse to act their age and so it was a bit of déjà vu peppered with more post-binge body aches than I’d recalled and a better paying job. But now I am 35 and life is grand. That’s why they want me.