Letter to Billy Joel

From McSweeney’s John Moe, A Note Placed in the Pay Envelope of Billy Joel:

Billy, that kind of thing is why people kept yelling at you all night. “Sing us a song, piano man! Sing us a song tonight!” they shouted. But instead of doing so, you simply shouted their words back to them and added a line about how you were making them feel all right. Which you weren’t. You were making them mad. People aren’t just in the mood for a melody, they’re in the mood for a legitimate composition.

Previous BJ-related McSweeney’s goodness: What I Would Be Thinking About If I Were Billy Joel Driving Toward a Holiday Party Where I Knew There Was Going to Be a Piano by Michael Ian Black, and The Lyrics to the Billy Joel Song “We Didn’t Start the Fire” If They Were Written by a Muskrat by David Litt.

More of John Moe’s Pop-Song Correspondences.

Billy Joel – Piano Man

Perhaps the most literal video ever made? Notice “Billy’s Tip Jar.” Not the most subtle guy in the world, old Bill, is he?

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